31.05.12

Today I was pretty impressed with my self control. Normally, following a difficult (or in this case agonizingly difficult) day, I tend to go straight for the junk food. I don't just go in for a simple taster either, I go full throttle. However, today I managed to keep myself in check. Instead of heading to the store and picking up a large chocolate bar (or two), I splurged by having two of my "Weight Watchers Belgian Chocolate & Vanilla Mousse" cups for dessert. 6 points versus 3....that is a splurge I am totally willing to make! Plus, they are delicious. If only I could remember this after every bad day; go for the mousse cup, don't buy chocolate. Managed to even keep it within my daily points allowance. Hooray.

That being said, I already know tomorrow is going to be another one for the difficulty books and Fridays equal alcohol. Fridays before a week off of work often mean copious amounts of alcohol. Oh dear. 

Refocus

Backstory:
I've always been overweight. Looking back through my life I can't remember a time when I wasn't "The Big Girl." It became an even bigger (no pun intended) problem when I was in university. I thought I was completely in control of everything, but of course I wasn't! I had ballooned up to a massive size 20 without even realizing it! That size was the largest I ever hit; after second year I was back to the size 18 I had ballooned to in first year and remained there until about a 15 months ago (2.5 more years).
Last January I finally decided enough was enough. Here I was pretending to be this happy, confident, independent and self-assured girl that I desperately wanted to be. Inside I was a pool of self esteem issues all based around my weight. I had no pre-conceived notions that losing weight would miraculously make everything in my life better, but I knew it was a good place to start. So I did.
Now, 15 months later I am down approx 80lbs, but have been stalled here for the past chunk of time. I've decided its time to start to refocus again and get back on track. I want to be able to say I've lost 100lbs. So now I'm making myself more accountable about what I am eating, doing and feeling in large part by starting this blog. Here we go...